I love to write, and have always stopped myself because I'm the person who writes "hear" instead of "here" and "to" instead of "too," and the embarrassment of that was enough for me to say "Nah, I'm not good enough."
I'm learning to push through, I'm throwing myself out there when I don't have the answers and it feel pretty uncomfortable sometimes. I figure it's easier for people to relate to someone going through the journey, than victorious on the other side. At least that is what I'm telling myself.
Fresh starts have been on my mind, we see it all the time, but I find September and January are times we tend to focus on getting our ducks in a row, and often it feels messier than we ever imagined.
Fresh starts may not be where you are at either, maybe you are starting out your journey as a mom and it feels awfully stale, lonely, and anything but fresh. Maybe it's a big move, or a diagnosis, or starting the hard work of counselling and working through your crap. Starts don't always feel fresh, they feel raw, they feel heavy, and like anything new or that brings change, a challenge. I want to encourage you that, it doesn't have to be ok. We don't have to pretend the beginnings of change are the best, and that we are ready to move mountains that maybe in the end only get nudged, but I do want to encourage you that the hard work is worth it, that out of pain beauty can rise. If I have embraced anything over the past few years it is that there is enough grace for little old me, so that means there is grace for you too. Fall arms wide open into that truth.
Take on the day with compassion for yourself, and see where it goes from there.